Children's perspective


The child that is groomed within the hoarded space is a child that is subject to many external stimuli. Excess information overloads the central nervous system which leads to feelings of stress, tiredness, low energy, irritation, anxiety, depression, procrastination, among others.

These have a tremendous impact on the child's behavior, mood, psychological stability, in the ability to form healthy relationships based on a healthy identity, the ability to utilize their space for activities, tasks and to bond, among other difficulties.

The problem is not just regarding the space that is disordered, impeditive and frustrating, but that the hoarder lives there is the direct cause of it all. No matter whether the hoarder says it's not their intention or that that have a good excuse, or that they'll fix it, in the end the result is the same - the child is still locked in that dynamic with a person that is incapable of maintaining a practical system.

The first problem of the CoH (child of hoarder) is the hoarder himself; the second problem is the hoard as it is; and the third problem is that situation and dynamic impacts daily activities and relationships. From removing the ability to bring colleagues for school projects, or friends for leisure, or even to establish romantic relationships, to not be able to change the configuration of the space to use it for different projects or to hold family gatherings and dinners, the hoard narrows down dramatically the number of possible social 'games' that can be played with the house.

These are just the spatial and relational problems, but over time the hoard brings other problems that begin to stack and create a 'snowball' effect.

If the hoard is not overcome or bypassed it will become a burden that will affect the natural development and phases of the CoH's life.

By making the CoH having to organize his life around the hoard, with all its paranoias, it heavily interferes in decision making quality and in the opportunities and solutions available to the CoH. This will narrow the development and lead to stunted growth.


Note: I advise any person trying to understand hoarding disorder through the narcissism lens. It will provide an essential template to understand hoarding behavior. It also stems from PTSD/CPTSD and it shares a lot of similar behaviors, symptoms, and dynamics.


Since the disordered parent creates a 'paracosm' within the hoard it forces the child to incorporate this parallel reality and create a split persona - the hoard persona and the outside persona. This split creates a false sense of reality since it forces the child to lie to everyone outside of the hoard to avoid shame, presenting a 'false-self', which acts like a 'double agent', leaving the real self behind in the hoard.



The greatest advantage between narcissism (NPD) and Hoarding Disorder is that many of the dynamics in narcissism are literally 'materialized' in the hoard. Once you start to notice that the pile of objects is the hoarder's mind turned inside out it becomes clear why it has this presentation.

The hoard is a shameful and terrified call for help by the hoarder. The hoarder will obviously rebel to any attempt to help him but, nevertheless, this extreme behavior is an outgrowth of an insoluble problem that goes well beyond a logistical challenge.

Naturally, any schism in the personality creates a 'cognitive dissonance'. Two sides that have began to have different lives will eventually create problems of integration internally, but it will also create difficulties managing two working personalities that don't clash with one another.

Each child is different, and I wouldn't presume to know how each person deals with the hoard emotionally and how they take measures to engage with it or escape it. But any person that stays in a severe hoard long enough will experience many of the symptoms previously mentioned. From stress, to anxiety, to shame, to disgust (even with oneself). All these primary emotions and feelings degenerate into second order states of consciousness that enhance the CoH experience into a more complex one. Stress can push the experience of reality into one of derealization.

The greatest challenges of the CoH is not having sufficient information and having to move through life without sufficient tools to ameliorate both their emotional state, and their situation and environment. Two routes must be worked on: the emotional stability side and restoring the environment to decent livable conditions.

Looking at the emotional toll and the destruction it leads to in the nervous system I have to say that, specially for underaged children, you might want to consider alerting the authorities to trigger lawful action due to negligence. It's not an easy move, and it certainly is not an action without consequences and costs but looking back it might have been life changing. See, the thing about the shared fantasy is that it will make you conspire against yourself for what you clearly see as noxious to yourself. It's insanity. It's sick. And it's very dangerous for your health and for your future - personality development and work.

The worse you let it get, without either taking serious measures or escaping altogether, it will undermine you every step of the way - your goals and relationships. This will breed frustration which will foster despair, anxiety and depression. It doesn't end well.





Alcohol and drugs are easy escapes that can serve for a time mitigate some of those feelings, but they not only don't deal with the root cause, they will progressively serve less and less to deal with primary feelings, and start masking secondary ones. And, in the end, you'll have to deal with the natural drawbacks of any chemical addiction. The better alternative is to have a clear mind at all times and use your mental resources and energy for your preferred strategy.

If you have another parent outside of the hoard, make the hoard situation evident and try to live with the healthier parent. Even if you have another family member that can help you you can try and take advantage of that opportunity. But in my experience the hoard doesn't quite leave you, regardless of where you go. Unless you are prepared to cut relations with the hoarder parent and not hide their pathology from the people in your life, it will use your goodwill against you and make you their agent. The hoard is so sticky because when the hoarder 'self-trashes' he also trashes his own identity which spills onto the people in their inner circle, soiling them. And don't make the mistake of assuming this is a secondary collateral accident; this was chosen every step of the way. They pull you down with you on purpose - for that purpose.

It's also a mistake to see the hoard as simple spatial assault. The hoard is boundary breach of your identity. And it will make you shameful because you were vulnerable enough to take it.

It doesn't matter how many times they'll say that it wasn't their intention or that they'll change. It will be too late. By then your life will be in shambles in every regard that matters, and he will have succeeded in taking you down with them.

The hoard isn't just a dictatorial landscape where trash and chaos are elevated with literal edifices to those principles, behind it is its supreme ruler - the hoarder. The hoarder gives everything to the hoard; is a slave to it, and at the same time is its God.

One thing you must realize is that hoarders have a psychodynamic that is solipsistic, materialistic, positivistic, and so they externalize their psyche without even realizing it. They create an external landscape that reflects their disorganized inner world and they expect you to become its subject through the external barriers and impositions.

As you live in the narcissistic space created by the hoarder you will become shaped by it and will become calibrated to it. But this is extremely emotionally dysregulating. The switch between the hoard and the outside world is very abrupt - having radically different rules and 'selves' you must manifest to operate within them. This implies that your 'self' will be stretched thin and eventually broken.



Make no mistakes that bringing up a child in the context of a hoarded space is neglect - physical, emotional, and psychological abuse. Do not doubt this for a second. Even if you understand the conditions that led the hoarder to that position and sets of behaviors, even if have some empathy or some gratitude for the good parts, do not, and I repeat "do not" let yourself be swollen by the stockholm symdrome. The momement you give an inch inside your mind is the moment you get complicit with the hoard and the hoard's advances in your mind. Just like narcissim it's a battle for your mind.

You are not less. You are not an appendix. You have to center your mind and priorities in yourself. Anything other than this is self-neglect. You collude with the hoarder for your own demise. You let them swallow you, just like a black hole (astronomical singularity), when you are past the 'event horizon'.

Even if you can lead the hoarder to rehabilitation of their behavior (which is possible), not only will it take a very long time - because it's on the hoarder's convenient time schedule - you won't be able to fix the underlying psychopathology originating the hoarding behavior, which is narcissism.

'Narcissism' is like a tree that grew up skewed or shrivelled - it can't be undone. Maybe with some serious pruning you could restart their growth in some stable conditions, but it won't ever rewrite the past. What's done is done. Narcissism has deep original wounds with the dynamic between the child and the primary caregiver and these are not going to simply get fixed. So you must manage your expectations regarding what you can and can't do.

What the hoard does to your living space is remove possibilities. And when you look at the hoard after a hard day of studying or work it looks like an impossible or overwhelming task. But you must realize that in order to go from a disorganized space to an organized space you must have the principles and skills to maintain a space, without letting it degrade. So, it's imperative that you focus on taking extreme measures in strategic waves.

If your goal is to leave you must go 'no contact' - which includes several strategies advanced by Sam Vaknin to bar any possible room to give the (narcissist) hoarder any encroachment into your life. For this you will most likely need financial resources and help from people you can count on to detach from your hoarder parent. But if you can't imagine how you will muster the emotional, psychological, relational, and material/financial resources to go through with your emancipation then all you're left with is to deal with the reality at hand.

This website is mostly focused on the latter because it's closer to my experience. In my experience, the hoard follows you around. It taints your image, your life story, the boundaries that were breached and, the hoarder alienates every possible attempt at a different life you try whether you stay or don't. The hoard lives in your mind much like 'introjected narcissist' in the 'object relations theory'. In order to change your inner 'objects' you must change them on the outside, or find a way to change how you relate to them. Neither are easy but both are somewhat possible.



Managing the hoard is essential because it's the source of your inner schism that will produce all negative symptoms you might suffer through. By fixing the hoard, that split will start to merge back up again, but not without cost. The longer you don't fix the situation the longer it will affect your abilities, your attention, your mental and emotional stability, and the longer it will deplete you of energy. Depending on the level of the hoard it will leave you with psychological scars that will haunt you for as long as you'll live.

People around you won't understand it. They won't understand why you are failing at work or school, why you can't get a girlfriend (or won't), why you push your friends away, why you are energy depleted, why you miss opportunities, why you lie, why you are depressed and anxious, why you have brain fog, why you are unmotivated, why you feel hopeless, and the worst: why you can't for the life of you tell anyone about your situation. If this last point doesn't clarify the cultish and 'captor-kidnap victim' relationship then nothing will.

The hoarder will isolate you more the longer you'll adhere to his side.



What's left at the end of your time with the hoarder is a cynical person that can't trust anyone, is overly sensitive, and doesn't feel supported by the hoarder to build a healthy life.

When you see what a person is capable of, to care about themselves, even if it destroys you, you begin to look at human beings differently. Human nature is no longer one of goodness (alone) but of extreme wickedness, especially by the people closest to you that owed you the most. This reorganizes you forever.

It's hard to say what kind of person leaves the other side but it's not a person that will see intimacy as safe place.




A plan for children of hoarders:


Children's path


  • Surrendering to God (something greater than yourself)
  • I was an atheist for most of my youth, well into early adulthood. One thing you end up understanding is that no idea exists alone. All ideas have adjacent ideas and worldviews. This means that 'atheism' like any other idea/philosophy has many other ideas attached to it that complements it. Some you adhere to and others you don't even realize they're there [poisoning you]. 'Positivism' and 'materialism' are two reality constructs that belong with the atheistic or agnostic worldview.

    Although when you start to deconstructing (also a key element 'deconstructionism') these philosophies you end up realizing how much they rest on subjectivism (as opposed to objectivism) given they end up taking human perspective for granted as a supra-truth viewpoint. And it's obviously a biased one and very much limited relationship with existence as a whole. When you realize how much the human sensory organs miss, you have to account for a much wider 'whole' - which you can't quite pin down - but you're confident it's there. By then you might as well follow the ancient philosophers, sages, and mystics and use 'God' as term to convey this unfathomable 'whole.

    This may seem all poetic, but when you understand the power of words and mental models (schemas) to rearrange your neuronal pathways, you begin to notice not only rationally, but also experientially, how a new worldview can transform your nervous system. 'God' gives a peace, a sense of belonging, purpose/meaning, and an alignment with currents of destiny that you can't access rationally nor deliberately without going through 'God'.

    So, it's highly advisable that you find your way to God, because the benefits are immeasurable, and will uplift you in the darkest hours.

  • Happiness from within
  • You find God inside you. Because how you look at 'God' allows you to see God everywhere from that moment on. And when you acquire this power you also acquire the power to regulate your emotions from the inside out. You are no longer just a product of the environment but you become your own environment as well; you make decisions and live with consequences instead of remaining in 'learned helplessness' in a 'deterministic' prison of your making and limited view.


  • Compassion/understanding/courage/resilience
  • The thing about being a CoH is that you have been sacrificed at the altar of objects. If capitalism has produced monstrosities one is the hoarder. And this gives the CoH the burden of changing themselves and society at large. The process of transcending the hoard is a 'rite of passage' and is an alchemical conversion. This means that this situation that happened to you is a symptom of societal illness you must cure on your own accord. As cruel or unjust it may seem you must build the inner strength to come out the other side without becoming bitter, vengeful, or destructive. You must find a way to emanate 'love'. And as cliché as it may seem 'love' is not only a world associated with joy and harmony but it is also a state of mind of expansion, growth and life. You must love yourself like you would nourish a plant. And then you put out that 'frequency' for others as well, to the extent that you manage extra energy to love.

    These words are not cheesy; they are essential. Through a philosophy of love you reorient your attention and grim cynical worldview to a 'wavelength' where good things are. It requires you to actively recalibrate yourself to be open to better things to come. And this doesn't mean to let go of your cynicism and doomed cosmovision, but it does mean that you must accept both sides of the coin and to learn to circulate the good through you and only take in sufficient cold truth to have a sane and realistic perspective of the world.

    Therefore you must learn to let go revenge, spitefulness, resentfulness, and forgive your hoarder parent not for them alone, but primarily for yourself - so you won't be controlled and influenced by negative emotions and states of mind (to your own detriment).


  • "Rage against the dying of the light"
  • Too many days have I faced of despair, hopelessness, and gloomy surrender. But why, as someone that had to live through all this chaos should not deserve a life worth living? You are responsible to prove whatever guiding force deciding your destiny that you have a say.

    Which is why you never give up. Which is why you will transmute whatever tragedy has befallen you into gold like Midas touch.





  • Family
  • Here come the great dilemmas that the CoH will come across when parting ways with the hoarder parent. Much like narcissists, hoarders have their tentacles around their children. This means that hoarder parents won't let their kids leave without a 'fight' and they will definitely hover other family members and triangulate as much as possible to find an angle to control their children, as well as turn other family members against them. This is what is so pernicious about detatching from these characters. They lay their 'spores' on everyone to use them as 'sentries' and servants to their cause.

    Leaving requires great care in who to choose to remain in contact with. Because if you give them an inch they will take a mile.

  • Career
  • If you are to build your own path you must find ways to maintain your balance and not fold. You need to learn how to regulate your emotions through many psychological techniques, through diet and exercise, through choosing your company (friends, intimate relationships, work environment) correctly, and learning as many skills as you can to keep yourself afloat by being resourceful.

  • Personality inadequacies
  • One of the biggest challenges you must learn to compensate for is the the lack of discipline and maintenance habits you missed in your upbringing. Another inadequacy you may find in you after your time of shame and anxiety is being sensitive to criticism. You must slowly expose yourself to constructive criticism by worthy mentors so you can build competency and self-sufficiency.

  • Cluster B
  • As I've alluded to in many different sections 'hoarding disorder' has many comorbidities with a plethora of symptoms from PTSD/CPTSD and from the dramatic personality disorders - a.k.a. 'Cluster B' personality disorders - and from the 'Cluster C' where you'll find the 'Dependent Personality Disorder', as well as the 'Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder'. All these disorders share mechanisms, presentations, and behaviors compatible with what we see in hoarders, and you should absolutely cross this information with your reality to evaluate the possible situation you might be living in.




Here we analyze how much genes and circumstance shape hoarding behavior and how much you will be prone to it. From what I can see hoarding stems from feeling an inner hole - that is a bottomless pit. This originally happens because the person was not loved unconditionally. Since they lack this love, they are incapable of giving the love they didn't have to their kids. One way or another the emptiness will be there for the child of a hoarder. The point is to end the cycle by knowing what you can and can't give, and by filling your inner emptiness with creative endeavors, helping others, and through reaching out to God.

All compulsive behaviors are compensatory, but they are also addictive. By this, it's meant, not just that they're repetitive, but that the person builds a ritualistic and psychological dependency to these behaviors. Through certain consecutive patterns the addict (hoarder) maintains 'Egosyntonicity' and regulates their emotions.

Failure to adjust, calibrate and supervise these behaviors and affects, often leads to addictive behaviors of many kinds. All addiction is 'addiction to addiction', because it reinforces the same neuronal pathways. And chances are you may have inherited the same neurochemical dysregulations.


Stress can emerge in all kinds of forms. From anxiety, to depression (anger turned inwards), to all sorts of autoimmune disorders. One of these ways which is particularly ironic is body awareness - a.k.a. 'derealization'. Complex PTSD can make your experience of reality change. You begin to neglect your hygiene, your dietary habits, the people you let in and out of your life, and how people treat you; you also can lose sense of when you're hungry or need to go to the toilet; this is even worse when you begin to not know how you feel, who you are; you become too intolerant of psychic pain, or too tolerant of physical pain; your boundaries get breached in so many ways that your sense of identity melts you and you will begin to fail to maintain your own body.

Your perception of yourself, reality and other people starts to dilute to such an extent you won't know what's what. Just imagine what having poor 'reality testing abilities' will do to your 'cosmovision', to your sense of direction, to your philosophy of life.

Soon enough what you think are your ideas become post hoc effects in your mind and body. The space changes your conscious experience. The physical disarray assaults your mind even if you don't see the bridge between the two. Mind and body have parallel presentations - you change one and the other changes accordingly.


Behavior 'ossifies'. This means that who we are becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy and, much like water filling a cup, living with a hoarder will train you to accept and adapt to that behavior. And once you become a fish in this sea, not only will you lack adaptations for other circumstances, you will have adaptations for this circumstance alone.

That's why it's paramount to solve your situation as soon as possible and reroute it towards healthy behaviors and adaptations. There is no time to waste in todays age, having problems beyond those of your survival.

Hoarders are so toxic that you can't afford to share the same environment. They will bombard your nervous system, leaving you at the edge and without energy to do your tasks. See, energy drain isn't just a problem of a wrecked nervous system; it's also due to lack of motivation. Meaning and purpose are like river beds for 'water' (energy) to flow, and this means that not having a parent you can count on, or that you expect them to sabotage you will cut off your possible routes for your character to unfold. Because this is what life is all about: gathering conditions to fulfill the advantages of your character. If your character is hindered in any way it will be innefective and demoralized. This will lead to lack of energy.

One of the reasons I stress for many CoH to find closure is that, much like any important relationship, a relationship with a hoarder parent will drain you and poison your identity and image, and you'll never be able to count on them for them to play the roles that involve any proximity of their house like in any healthy family. They are self-destructive, which means they are destroying you as well.

You won't be able to erase the past. For all intents and purposes this was a sort of 'violation'. And I'm not here to compare it to 'sexual abuse' but it's abuse nonetheless; and there's no coming back from it. Some CoH may not have suffered as others for many reasons, like relative positioning in society, or because they were more resilient, or had outside help, or were less sensitive to disgust, or the hoard level was less intense, who knows? The point is that there is a subjective component to how each person deals with having lived in these conditions. And for some it can prove to be absolutely disastrous for their life path and work as contagion contaminating everything good in their lives.

Hoarding can bring crippling levels of shame. And I don't say this lightly. How fast and how you leave the hoard is crucial to be managed properly so it doesn't come back to haunt you.


There are two types of CoH relevant for this analysis: one leaves fairly unscathed and often has turned on the hoarder parent; and the other type usually is still in the psychological grasp of the hoarder - thus being at their mercy and having their lives in standby and crippled because of their parent. Connecting with other people is usually a reproduction of the template transported from our home environment into other people. If a substantial part of our lives was in a dynamic with a hoarder our nervous system will be tailor to that type of interaction. Dealing with an hoarder is alienating. It makes you different, victim, with feelings of disgust towards others and yourself, you 'split' into extremes of separating people between 'good' and 'bad', you may shift from being elitist as a compensation to having low self-esteem, you may become both very sensitive to criticism and with a very think crust. It's not unlikely to have contradictory dualistic styles. Your reality forced a very marked difference of rules, behaviors and expectations, between the hoard environment and the rest of the world. For a child that grows in that environment they use the family system and dynamic as a small reproduction of the world which becomes extremely scary and leading to paranoia. Think about it: the child is under a dictatorship, and the rational response is to lay low and appease the dictator. As time goes by there is also rebellion, but as long as there is financial dependency and sharing the same space, the rational behavior is to appease the emotions of the hoarder and expand the sphere of operation more and more to create more and more preemptive or mitigative measures. But given the cost of not displacing any object, not discarding, not replacing, not maintaining, etc, a person becomes very much sensitive and delicate in an hostile world. This is the view that is extrapolated to the world at large - the world is chaos; it's hostile; and anything you touch will lead to punishment. And the hard truth is that this is a realistic depiction of the world, in the great scheme of things. What this doesn't award is a game plan to create an individual that can more and operate in society.

This where I'm giving my view but I'm not sure what the correct answer is. Each CoH finds their own solution to facilitate their hoarder parent's life; or not at all. I think this is the decisive and crossroad which each CoH must take on their own.


As I've mentioned, the solution that requires the CoH to remain in the hoarder parent's orbit is much more emotionally taxing but it's likely the only path with a flimsy chance for closure.

Closure may not be possible altogether, but we know what lack of closure does regarding unresolved feelings, issues, and relationships. Specially due to the fact that our personalities are built on top of early memories, emotions and infantile constructions, specially because of this, we must create mature experiences that solidify our foundations so we know where we stand regarding our relationship with our hoarder parent and our relationship with ourselves. Because like it or not, ignoring the problem won't solve future relational problems, and having a mature relationship with the hoarder - as a representation inside you - is key for our resolved you are. I think one the approaches that makes a lot of difference is to play a sort priestly 'persona' (truthfully, not theatrically) - a mix of psychiatrist and Buddha - that is focused on temperance, some detachment, some patience, some consul abilities, and some biology scientist stance. A good philosophy of morals and wisdom does a world of good in managing the hoarder and their outbursts and inability to regulate their own emotions in mature and responsible ways. It's a very 'expensive' and draining task of playing this persona but it has its advantages you can transport to other relationships at large. Mainly, you learn to manage people, dynamics, environments, in a more objective, mature and purposeful manner. You take relationships as controlled interchanges you can negotiate; instead of chaotic accidents that just happen to you.

But if you can escape the hoarder without any of this psychological musculature, by all means save yourself as best you can.

Just be mindful to not let the hoarder living inside your mind to corrupt you from within, even after you are gone from their scope.


Stepping out of the hoard is like stepping out of a shell. So long have you been hiding behind your own shame and anxiety that to step out of these feelings you must have built such a stable and strong core that can withstand the transition without wavering.

One of the major problems of living with a hoarder is the influence the house will hold in your memory. Its memories will pull you back towards past habits and patterns. I used to barely open the blinders; barely open the door; be sedentary because I had no energy and no will to clean at the cost of facing psychological backlash. These patterns will come back. And you must police them. Especially if you begin to lose momentum in life. See, the hoard can change your life trajectory, your choices, your friends, your career, and it will always pull you into its negative spirals. But the way to reverse this tendency is to build new patterns, new plans, new goals, new objectives, meet new people that pull you to their activities and so you keep the ball rolling. It's not an easy feat to re-establish boundaries, limits to your behavior, patterns in your consciousness stream of thoughts and states of mind. These are so fluid and gradual that they are like the frog in the boiling water. So keeping yourself in check is one of the most challenging feats that will demand your careful deliberate calibration.

To this day I can revert back to old patterns. I was stretched so much that I'm used to withstanding even suicidal thoughts without forcing myself to change any aspect of my behavior. But the thing is that as you improve it becomes an upward spiral - even when you revert, you don't go down as much and it won't take so much to get back up.

I can't tell you that you will be completely restored to your 'factory settings' but you will improve drastically and sustainedly if you keep going even if you fall down. As long as you trust that the down times will pass you will always reach the end of the cycle.

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